i'm real.

you ever wonder if your life is really happening? after seeing "the truman show" at the ripe age of eleven, i have always questioned existence in a weird way. of course i've traveled across the country numerous times, both on airplane and on the road, so surely i'm not living on some crazy island that is only a mile or two across. and i've never seen cameras hidden around my life capturing my every move, but that's probably mostly because my life is just not that interesting.

in fact, that is the reasoning that i hold (probably stupidly) when i make many of my choices and formulate opinions about certain things. i'm not afraid of heights (like climbing on ladders / genies / across the really-really-high grid in the light lab) because i'm positive that i'm not going to fall off of anything. my life is just not interesting enough for me to sustain any sort of injury. it's the same reason i don't get my hopes up about little things that could be awesome...because they won't happen. bad reasoning? maybe. but that's how i see it. it's real enough for me.

granted, there are exceptions. i got into the broadcast major (surely through some sort of miracle). i live in a sweet house with a roommate that i don't hate. i own a car that i love (xox lex). i won goo goo dolls concert tickets once. i live a pretty decent life...nothing too incredibly terribly awesome, but nothing too miserably awfully crushing either. overall pretty regular i guess. can't complain about that.